Let's Talk About You: Why values matter in communication

Alright, let's kick things off by having a real heart-to-heart. Ever thought about who you are and why you do what you do? Maybe it sounds a bit off-topic when we're talking about sales and communication, but trust me, there's a fascinating connection between your values and how you interact with others.

So, why am I bringing up values when we're in the realm of selling and communication? Well, here's the deal – I'm currently diving into the world of neuroscience and coaching, and a recent lesson on values and life purpose shook up my whole perspective. It made me question not just who I am but also why I do what I do.

Throughout my life, I found myself doing things because I was told they were right or because they were expected of me by so-called experts. You know those people who think they know you better than you know yourself and are quick to tell you what to do. This applies to communication too, and here's a funny (and kinda sad) story to illustrate.

Back when I joined a big-shot pharmaceutical company, I had to make a presentation to the top honchos. My boss at the time decided to teach me how to give a presentation. Now, keep in mind, I grew up in New York City where using your hands and gestures while talking was second nature. But during this all-important presentation, my boss told me to keep my hands in my pockets and jingle some coins. It felt completely unnatural, but I followed his advice. You know what happened? It was a disaster. Why? Because it wasn't me speaking; it was some made-up version of me concocted by an authority figure. It took me years to figure out what was going on, and that's where values come into play.

Do you want people to really hear and understand you when you talk to them? Well, most of the time, right? Of course, we've got to remember that sometimes folks have a million things on their minds, so we might not be their top priority. But, in my opinion (and remember, these are just my thoughts), the most important part of communication is being authentic, being yourself.

Your values and your purpose are crucial here. For me, using my whole self, including those expressive hand gestures, is a vital part of my values. I have to be consistent in everything I do; otherwise, I'm just putting on an act, and people can spot that a mile away. But here's the kicker – we all have that little 'saboteur' inside us, that 'judge,' or as I like to call it, the 'sh**y committee.' They tell us what we should do, or worse, what we must do. They warn us that if we say this or that, it'll be the end of the world. You know the drill. It's up to us to have a chat with that part of ourselves.

Being true to who you are starts from within, and it's not always a walk in the park.

Here's a challenge for you: Next time you're about to do something important, like give a presentation, pause for a moment. What kind of conversation do you have with yourself? Do you hear different 'voices' or perspectives? Have you ever responded to them?

Stay tuned for the next blog, where we'll keep the conversation going and dive even deeper into authentic communication and self-discovery.